Friendship: The Best Antidote for Loneliness in Seniors


Nobody likes loneliness. And for seniors, loneliness can become too painful. They find their children and grandchildren busy in their own work and it seems there is nobody in the whole world to take care of them. Moreover, attending funerals of their beloved ones makes them feel worse. Their loneliness gradually makes them enter a state of depression. They feel the need for making friends and friendship is the only medicine for them at this stage.

It is not that the more number of friends they make, the happier they become. Rather, they want to optimize their friendship and befriend selected people. Friendships at this stage happen following the theory of emotional selectivity. They tend to lose ties with friends showing superficial emotions and instead prefer those with whom they can form strong ties of friendship.

The activities of daily living also tend to change with age. They find difficulty in performing their basic tasks and need someone to assist them. Of course, they can’t expect their friends to help them out with these activities since these friends are (usually) seniors too. But they can at least share their problems with each other and find solutions. For instance, if Mr. X finds difficulty in tying shoelaces since this requires him to bend down, he should feel free to discuss this problem with Mr.Y, who, in turn, can give some ideas like buying a pair of shoes without laces.

At this age, people discover that they have lost their importance or role in decision making to some extent. This hurts them and makes them feel isolated from their family. Living in retirement communities can be a good idea for them since they will be able to live in an environment comprising people of their ages only. They will gradually become a part of the senior living homes and begin to feel homely. Friends are the only antidote in this kind of mental illness and there cannot be a place better than the senior homes to offer the same.

Together, they can discuss sports, politics, weather or any topic they wish to (in case of men). Similarly, in case of women, they can discuss meals, movies, knitting and other similar topics. Thus, sending the older people to the senior homes is not a way to avoid one’s responsibilities in looking after them but to make the seniors feel better and happier. The children should understand that taking care of the seniors at home may be difficult and it will not be possible for them to give sufficient time to their seniors to discuss their areas of difficulty. On the other hand, at the senior homes they will be able to live much happily and peacefully. After all, people of same age and coming from similar situations have their wavelengths matched easily.

Living in retirement communities is thus quite common these days and the concept has totally changed. Previously it was considered that the retirement communities are meant for physically disabled elders or considerably sick elders for whom living life independently was not possible. Today, a number of senior citizens from varied age groups (in their 60s, 70s or 80s) prefer to live in these communities out of choice.

There are a number of social activities such as wine tastings, concerts, cultural programs and day-outs organized by these senior homes in which the elders can take part and enjoy. This helps them overcome their depression and loneliness to a great extent.

Additionally, there are wellness programs and yoga sessions held at regular intervals which ensure a better physical as well as mental health of the elderly people. Adequate resources and infrastructure is also present for nursing and hence one does not need to worry about their health related problems.

Also, stress due to activities of daily life is reduced to a large extent as there will be a gardener to look after the garden at the backyard, cooks, maids and other staff members to take care of the needful.

As a result of all these, the number of seniors inhabiting the senior homes has increased with time and is still on the rise.

So what are the main signs of loneliness that will help you to identify that your parents or elders need elderly loneliness solutions?

Retirement: it is often found that the elders become lonely after retirement and this is when they need to be shifted to places like senior homes.

Loss of near and dear ones: The death of close people makes the elders disheartened and lonely.

Deterioration of health: When health deteriorates, the elders feel the need of such a place where they can be nursed and treated accordingly.

In such situations, it is recommended that the elders are moved to the senior homes where they will be able to live in a better environment!

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